It's that time of the year again when we celebrate the holidays. It's funny how the holidays remind us of special memories from our childhood. Playing, school pageants, and Santa. Playing in the snow was not as exciting for me as it was other kids. Snow and disabled people don't make a great combination. Still to this day I'm still puzzled how R2D2, the galactic cripple, moved with such ease around the planet Hoth. My mom would spend an hour bundling me up in a snow suit and put mittens on my hands to go outside to play. You have all seen my hands, putting mittens on me is as challenging as solving a Rubik's Cube.
Let me take a moment to list the many ways that I could play in the snow:
- Make snow angels
That's it. 1 hour to dress. 2 hours of play. A lot of dumb ass snow angles in the front yard.
When I was young I attended a school with just disabled people. Like regular schools, they too would have an annual Christmas show. The major difference was that most of the cast was non-verbal. It was difficult to tell whether they were singing jingle bells, frosty the snowman, or silent night...it all sounded the same! Being that I was in the front my back was soaked from their spit. Their Christmas play was more like an nativity set with Joseph wearing a hockey helmet, given that no one could actually move around on stage.
I remember one time that my mom brought me to sit on Santa's knee so I could tell him what I wanted for Christmas. Sitting on his knee, Santa asks, "David, Do you want Santa to bring you a new pair of legs for Christmas?"
First off, why is Santa talking in 3rd person?
Second, isn't Santa supposed to listen to what I want instead of drawing attention to me being disabled?
Third, why do I smell Scotch?
I replied, "The Millennium Falcon, page 345 in the Christmas wish book, with batteries!"
Christmas Eve always brought great excitement...Santa was coming to bring presents! Would I get the Millennium Falcon or the 'Race 'n Chase' race track? I remember trying to pretend to be sleeping one Christmas Eve as 'Santa' was attempting to put together (what I would come to find out) a race track. The cusses of "God D***t, Stupid piece of sh!t," filled the air. I remember thinking to myself, "Santa has quite a potty mouth for a jolly man".
We all have special childhood memories of Christmas. As adults we get to relive the magic of Christmas through little ones. Instead of receiving - we give. We give memories for the next generation.
Have a great Christmas everyone!
Until next time...